also known as
“PANDEMICS ARE FOR THE BIRDS”
So here we are, 2020, the year of the Worldwide Pandemic. Or does “pandemic” mean worldwide?
(I’ll google later)
It’s real and scary, and I feel deeply for those who are compromised or in need of ongoing medical attention. This is a poopy-situation (sorry, and yes, Robin, we’re all tired of TP jokes).
Please take this as it was intended, light and with a caring heart. . . we all need to pray & laugh.
When this thing hit, it meant my babies were coming home!! Selfishly, it was time to Mom-Shine. My time to remind them of how fabulous BEING HOME was!
(Snow White-like birds singing)
Jack & I excitedly stocked the house with food & TP, not because of the hoarding factor, but because we were now suddenly feeding 3-squares to 4-mouths (YAY).
As empty-nesters, our weeks had evolved into Take-Out-Palooza. Real Example: Monday “night” at 4:45 pm, we meet our neighborhood tribe at a local pub for “Five Dollar Burger Night.” Delicious burgers, no work, and FRIENDS! Bonus: 4:45pm = Linner (or Lupper).
As I prepared the nest for both babies to return (again YAY), as per COVID19 (not so yay), I remembered how hard it was when our nest slowly emptied. What the heck will it be like when BOOM, back to a Full House? ? ?
NOTE: I CRINGE to reference that adorable TV Show as our youngest got into “one of those schools” the year of “Varsity Blues,” but “To each their own Lori ‘McCheaterPants’ Loughlin .” (Google “Varsity Blues” if I lost you during my rant).
COVID19 SECRET COVERSATIONS
Staying ON TREND, I’ll refer to our kids as TENANTS. . .
PARENTS: All our privacy is gone.
TENANTS: All our privacy is gone.
PARENTS: They get out of bed so late.
TENANTS: They go to bed so early.
PARENTS: We’ll probably be buying them new computers…their screens are ORANGE.
TENANTS: Seriously, still using BLUE screens??
PARENTS: Glad we stocked up on bottled waters for them!
TENANTS: Bottled Waters? Are they trying to kill our planet?
PARENT 1 to PARENT 2: I was just told they couldn’t sleep on sheets that were not 100% organic, non-GMO, recycled, vegan, non-dyed fibers.
TENANT 1 to TENANT 2: All they talk about is eating brand & fiber.
PARENTS: How can they watch FRIENDS all day?
TENANTS: HGTV & Fox News 24/7??
TENANTS: When can you do laundry?
PARENTS: When can YOU do laundry?
HARRISON: All my humans are home. Best QUARANTINE ever.
Take It & Fly
To sum up our first week of ReNesting COVID19 Style, We set some GUIDELINES…
I. Door Opened ½ inch = Knock and “You can put my clean laundry away now.”
II. Door Opened 2 inches = Knock and Turn Down Service please (98% cocoa chocolate covered acai berries please).”
III. Door Opened 2 feet = Knock and “Yes, time to clean the bathroom.”
IIII. Door Closed = Don’t Even.
They’re missing their independence, schools, and friends, AND I even LoVe that. Bailey’s are playing by “the rules” in this crazy time, in hopes, it will pass quickly. But in the meantime, be still my heart, A FULL, HEALTHY NEST!
LoVe & OVER THE MOON TO HAVE KIDS BACK, for a while. . .
P.S. To any TENANTS who may be reading, this blog is all in the spirit of making someone laugh, you guys are AMAZING (just look at your mom!).